No, You Don’t Just Get 18 Summers With Your Kids

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YOU ONLY GET 18 SUMMERS WITH YOUR KIDS.

But, guess what? You also get 18 Springs, and 18 Falls, and 18 Winters. I bet when my kids are 19 or older, we might still have summers together too.

You also get more than that actually because when your kid turns 18 and they move out (we hope), do you stop being a parent?

No. Do they stop needing you? Yes, more than when they were babies, but also – no, not really.

I hate these articles I see making their rounds every summer to make sure we soak up the summer with our kids because we only get 18.

Yes. Enjoy as much as you can, but don’t feel guilty if the fact that they spilled a slurpee under your dining room table on day 3 of Summer break and didn’t tell you about (or clean it up) for SEVERAL hours is enough to make you not enjoy that minute.

It’s OK if those minutes you complain, or vent, or don’t enjoy the fact that your kids are all up in your business 24/7 during the Summer.

You only get 18 Summers, yes. But, you really get a lifetime when you’re a mom.

You get a lifetime of I love you’s and of being one of the most important people in the world to another person.

That’s a special gift every day of the week, and every season of the year.

Summer is special, yes because we get more time. But, it’s also hard because we get more time.

It’s not that we don’t love our little cherubs, it’s just that are cherubs also act like little a-holes sometimes, too.

Summer isn’t about cramming it all in because you’ve only got 18. Yes – enjoy your summer, but it’s OK if it’s hard.

It can be both enjoyable and hard. That’s what people don’t seem to get when they try to break a lifetime of work like motherhood down into 18 Summers for an article.

I just don’t buy it. Summer isn’t the only time to bond with your kids. In fact, in some families, Summer might be the time where you un-bond because of the fact that you’re on top of each other like sardines.

I love having my kids home for the Summer, but it’s also hard for me.

IT CAN BE BOTH.

I’ll admit, when I heard “You Only Get 18 Summers” as a title of a blog post years ago, it made me catch my breath. But, now it just ticks me off for what it implies.

That I’m not doing enough, or being enough, or savoring enough. Yeah, no. I don’t subscribe to that nonsense.

There is never enough time when you’re a parent. Summers or not.

Motherhood is a constant race against time, and you have to find ways to enjoy as much as you possibly can.

Not all of it. Don’t get crazy. That’s not possible. Have you potty trained? Let’s be real.

BUT, it’s OK if some of it you don’t make the most of. Some of it is not enjoyable. Some of it you’re not crafting unicorns with popsicle sticks or making sidewalk chalk paint.

Let’s not try to diminish the value of every day with our kids by guilting us with the phrase – “You only get 18 Summers with your kids”

No, if I’m lucky I’ll get a lot more than that. They’ll still love me when they’re 19 (I hope) and I would guess that there will still be summers in my future with young adults and grand babies.

Enjoy what you can, but give yourself grace if Summer isn’t where your heart is because your heart also belongs to silence and alone time.

You don’t love your kids any less.

And the truth is, there are more than 18 Summers, and more seasons in the year too.

You’re doing enough with this Summer, and all the rest. So, take a deep breath, mama and go out there and enjoy this summer like crazy. Or not. Or both.

It will be OK.

YOU ONLY GET 18 SUMMERS WITH YOUR KIDS.But, guess what? You also get 18 Springs, and 18 Falls, and 18 Winters. I bet…

Posted by Perfection Pending by Meredith Ethington on Tuesday, May 28, 2019

 

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