Last Friday Night (Mom Version)


Katy Perry’s got nothing on a Mom’s Friday night.

There’s a child in my bed

Might be urine by my head

Diapers all over the room

Is that glitter, get the broom

I smell like a barnyard

Husband passed out on flash cards

Barbie’s naked on the floor

What’s this sticky mess on the door

Pictures of my kids

Ended up online

I’m a Mom

Oh Well

It’s a whacked out life

But I signed up I’m the wife


Last Friday night

Yeah, we put the kids to bed

All the screaming hurt my head

No one slept I should have fled

Last Friday night

Yeah, we spanked all of the kids

Got ticked, lost all my e-bay bids

So I had a glass of wine

Last Friday night

Kids came streaking through the room

Chased them with the wooden spoon

Then had some more wine

Last Friday night

Yeah I think I broke the law

DCF no need to call

I just tripped over a doll

This Friday night

Do it all again

This Friday night

Fill my glass again

Here’s to plenty more Friday nights like this one 🙂



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