What Strangers Have Taught Me About My Mid-Life Crisis


On Monday I published It’s Not A Mid-Life Crisis, It’s A Quest. It has caused quite a stir, check out the comments to fully understand why I am writing this rebuttal. I am happy to report that it brought hundreds of people to my page, and thousand of people to my blog. That tells me that I am not alone. There are many women out there who are feeling the same way I am. There are many women who are trying to balance the craziness of life while remaining true to themselves.

The other thing this post taught me, is that people are angered and vehemently opposed to change and growth. The piece is about self exploration and a quest for meaning. The post is about knowing who you are and being comfortable in your skin. The piece is about the journey.

The stereo typical mid-life crisis of the 1970’s may still exist, but that is not my crisis. I am not sure if I am choosing to have a different crisis, or if women just so happen to have a different type of crisis. My crisis shall be a quest. My crisis shall be an educational journey into my mind and soul. My crisis will result in the betterment of myself and my family. Why, because I get to choose how I live and deal with my crisis.

Women are perceptive, emotional, conceptual, intelligent, motivated beings. We can quest for what ever the hell we want to quest for.

10 Things This Crisis Is NOT

This is not about replacing my husband and family.
This is not about becoming a new person.
This is not about running away.
This is not about complaining and being unhappy.
This is not about judgment and throwing stones at my husband.
This is not about having an affair to fill an emotional void.
This is not about being less of a Mom or shrugging my responsibilities.
This is not about choosing to let my children suffer to make myself happy.
This is not about marrying young and not knowing who I am.
This is not about YOU!

10 Things This Crisis IS ABOUT

This is about discovering my talents and passions.
This is about allowing myself to be the person I was meant to be.
This is about running towards my goals and dreams.
This is about finding balance.
This is about finding a way to bring my family with me on my quest.
This is about learning to fill the void by giving myself permission to quest for my passion.
This is about having no regrets.
This is about paving the way for other women to find their voice.
This is about using my voice to tell MY story.
This is about MY quest, MY families role in the quest, and MY determination for it to be a success.

If you feel this way I urge you to stop what you are doing and evaluate. Evaluate your life, your relationships, your goals, and your dreams. Do not stay complacent as to not rock the boat. Regrets will sink a ship faster than an iceberg. It won’t be easy, but I guarantee you that it will be worth it. Join me.

This was originally published on Suburban Misfit Moms.


  1. You have done nothing wrong. You have not written anything wrong. You are expressing yourself, giving voice to your hopes and dreams, and demonstrating your desire for self improvement. You are growing and expanding your capabilities and experience. I applaud you for what you do, and couldn’t care one bit about those that say defamatory or critical things about what you write.

    You keep writing, I’ll keep reading, and to heck with the grumpy, cranky, judgmental folks out there. 🙂


    • Hi Cheryl,
      Agreed! I will keep writing and you keep reading. I am not about to give up on becoming who I was meant to be. Posting that very personal piece taught me a great deal. I appreciate the support.

  2. I admire you! I respect you! And I send lots of love, strength and support your way! I rarely leave comments because I’m too f***ing busy, but the fact that other women are critizing you just makes me so frustrated!! Aren’t we all in this together?!?? Don’t we all want to be the best mother, wife, friend, daughter, sister, worker,…woman we can be???? Good for you for reaching for your goals, for having the courage to even imagine your quest, let alone work toward your quest!! Don’t listen to the nay-Sayers! Gain strength from those who support you and admire you! We all gain strength from your courage! Together we can be the best we are meant to be! I love your openness and honesty and always look forward to reading your work. Stay strong!! Woman strong!!!

  3. I found your blog when I was searching for posts by women going through lifestyle changes, and I’m so pleased I did. Both the original post and this one ring true for me and I’m sure for so many other women. Some of the comments over on the Huff Post are frankly astounding. I’ll never cease to be amazed at how people can be outraged by anything and everything other people do. That’s probably because you speak a truth that frightens many of them.
    Anyway, I’m looking forward to reading more.


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