I’ve heard the same words all my life. They are almost always spoken when people have said a passive aggressive remark, otherwise known as a ‘back-handed compliment.’ They border on the issue defining me for being upset at their words.
I should in all intent and purpose ignore the words or laugh. Maybe I should plaster my face with an admiring smile and be grateful for the attention I have received. I can only remark in an exhausted tone how I am tired.
“You’re too sensitive,” they say. Another form to acknowledge my nature is saying how I’m too emotional.
The simple answer is yes, I’m sensitive. I’m emotional. I’m compassionate. I’m empathetic. I’m a great deal of many human emotions and I make no burden to ever hide the way I feel.
Why should I hide? Where is the lack of honesty when someone says a statement meant to tear me down?
My girlish grin has over time grown into a woman’s scowl at the being told how I should feel and react to the harshness of this world.
I am not here to appease people by smiling and batting my mink eye lashes. My emotions are human. It is my wish for others to not hide how they feel. Honesty can diminish the bottled up hurt, which over time eats away and corrodes a self esteem.
My feelings are not wrong, just as others have explicit rights to their feelings.
However, when another person’s feelings or statements trample on hurting others, should we ignore them? No. Immediately identifying my sensitivity is almost always looking to scapegoat bad behavior by turning a table.
By defining the words they said which caused an original reaction, they wish to ignore the precedent remark.
In saying ‘you’re too sensitive,’ they wish their words would be forgotten and glossed over.
Accountability for the words should be accepted by the person who made the original hurtful remark, and not placed on me for feeling the pain and hurt they intended to cause.
No one controls the fine tuning to which I feel. Hurt is hurt. And it doesn’t make me too sensitive for acknowledging words which have caused me question myself, or my appearance, or the way I think.
There are gifts in feelings.
My sensitivity is my greatest gift.
It allows me to breathe in love at every possible breath. It allows me to see when others are hurting and extend a hand in friendship, or be the shoulder they need to cry on.
It allows me to understand we all face hard times, and relate at a simplistic, most basic level of understanding.
My sensitivity also gives grace to know I can say something off the cuff. I, too, may hurt feelings.
When I do, I want to know precisely what I’ve said. I want to apologize and make known I never walk with any intention to outright tear another person down.
My sensitivity is at the core of how I process every emotion within me.
Although others can be tired or look to avoid the confrontation in their own actions, I choose to never ignore the road I’m walking down. This road, I have the greatest hope, is leading me to be better.
A better mother.
A better writer.
A better lover.
A better partner.
Overall, a better woman.
I choose to use my sensitivity to grow and not be stifled with unprocessed emotions lingering inside of me.
Yes, I feel. I feel at a molecular bleeding heart level.
It’s the gravity in what goes up must come down. For the way I expect to be treated and respected is met with the same kindness extended to others.
As the golden rule states, treat others as you wish to be treated. My compassion is given through my sensitivity.
Ultimately, I wish we could be nicer, kinder, and more understanding in how our words carry weight. In acknowledging the hurt we can cause to people.
I walk daily in trying, in being the change I wish to see. I wish to see a world where we aren’t looking to chastise others because they feel, but we accept them as our equals and our peers.
We love each other as we want to be loved. This is my sensitivity.
This is my emotional behavior. It is derived in absolute love, for all people. I’m done defending it.
I’m done glossing over mistakes, rudeness, and insensitivity to make people comfortable for their bad behavior.
Instead of blaming another because they felt the weight of your words or actions, examine inward to see the necessary reason for wanting to inflict pain or heartache on another.
Strip off the tough exterior protecting yourself. Hardened people make a cruel world. If those words offend you, maybe you’re feeling too sensitive today.