I have a confession to make. It’s a deep, dark secret. Something I tell myself I should stop doing and yet, I continue to feed my habit. My mom friends look down on me for it and my husband finds it utterly ridiculous. My secret keeps me up at night, and sometimes I’ll awaken in a cold sweat at 4:00 a.m. just to get my fix. It’s my secret shame and I’m finally ready to tell the world my story. Have you heard of Elf on the Shelf?
Well, I love the Elf on a Shelf.
I love it! I move not just one elf, but THREE elves around my house nightly in December.
Each of my daughters has her own elf, which they have named Charmander, Heart, and Rosie. We also own all the elf pets and have different outfits.
I’ve been known to spend tens of dollars every year on random crap to accompany them on their nightly mischief. Go big or go home, right?
I know what you’re thinking . . . it’s terrible. You’re thinking I’m making things worse for other moms.
You’re thinking my children are spoiled, and I’m some Pinterest-crazy nutcase.
Unfortunately for me, you’re right. I am all of those things and my children are incredibly spoiled, but I’m here to defend the elf.
Here are some reasons the Elf on the Shelf is good for my family:
The little turds are like built-in hall monitors.
As moms, we have a lot to do in the month of December, and we don’t have time for constant bickering and messy rooms. The elf will keep nonsense to a minimum.
Usually all it takes is a reminder that the elves are just in the next room, but sometimes you have to pull out all the stops.
Last year about 10 days before Christmas my 5-year-old cut off all her hair. Like to a half inch in spots. It was bad, really bad. I was livid. She didn’t seem phased by my anger, but the next morning when she woke up her elf had not moved.
She knew she had done something wrong, and I had an angel child for the remainder of Christmas. Her elf eventually moved and she was thrilled.
It’s fun for me.
I’ll be honest, I am someone who likes to get my creative juices flowing, and since becoming a mom it is hard to find those opportunities. The elves are definitely a creative outlet for me.
Whether it’s building a popsicle-stick Christmas tree house for them, building a cereal box fort, or buckling them up in car seats to be found after school, it’s fun. I’ve heard the argument that it is so time consuming, and believe me I understand.
That’s why some nights I just throw them in the freezer and explain to my kids, “Well, they must have missed the North Pole.”
It’s Christmas, dang it!
I know it’s more work and unnecessary, but come on people! It’s Christmas and your kids are only going to believe in this ridiculousness for so long. Get up off your butts and move the elf.
Watching your children hunt for their Elf on the Shelf every morning and laugh at their antics will bring you so much happiness.
Which makes it totally worth the 3 minutes of work you did the night before. You don’t have to be elaborate, you can move them from the tree, to the shelf, to the light fixture, then on the table, the counter, etc. Look, I just planned half the month for you!
You’ll reap the benefits in 20 years.
Do you ever look back on your childhood Christmases and marvel about all the work your mom did for you? Doesn’t it make you feel so grateful and have so much love for her?
Hello! That will be you in 20 years. Just imagine your little Suzy as a mom, realizing all the crap you did every night in December to make her childhood as magical as it could be. Can you say brownie points? You’ll be in the best retirement home money can buy!
I know I won’t convince you all. In fact, I’m sure the comments section is about a mile long by now full of Karens and Susans educating me on my parenting.
This is just one mom’s humble opinion about one of her favorite family traditions. What’s right for my family may not be right for yours, and vice versa.
Just know that my kids have decided that Santa only sends elves to his favorite children.
Now I’ve tried to disprove this theory, but their case is rock solid. I’m just preparing you for any lunch room talk that may seep its way into your minivan.
It feels so good to finally admit my secret shame to you all. Quite frankly, I’m not ashamed at all, but instead excited for December 1st. Everyone knows that’s when the elves show up.
I leave you with this advice: When you’re out shopping and you see that dreaded red and white Elf on the Shelf box, remember my words. You can do it! Have some fun with it and move the dang elf!
You’ll be thanking me when you’re sipping iced tea next to the pool at your luxury senior condo in 30 years, trust me!
Merry Christmas and Happy Elfing!