Starting a serious conversation with kids can be daunting, especially as you hit the tween/teen years. Here are three quick tips to help you get started:
- Ask Open-Ended Questions: Instead of asking yes-or-no questions, ask open-ended questions that encourage kids to share more about their thoughts and feelings. An example for everyday chats is, instead of asking, “Did you have a good day at school?” you could ask, “What was the most exciting thing that happened at school today?” Open-ended questions invite kids to provide you with more information to continue the conversation. With a serious topic like online safety, you might ask, “What are your favorite games to play online?” or “Which sites are the most fun to be on?”
- Show Genuine Interest: Kids can tell when you’re genuinely interested in what they have to say. Show enthusiasm, make eye contact, and actively listen to their responses. When they see that you care about their thoughts and experiences, they’ll be more likely to open up and engage in the conversation.
- Use Their Interests as Conversation Starters: Kids often have their own specific interests and hobbies. Use their interests as a starting point for conversations. For example, if a child loves music, you can ask them about their favorite musician, inquire about their favorite songs or lyrics, or even suggest letting them choose the next car ride playlist. Tailoring your conversation to their interests makes it more enjoyable and relatable for them. When you want to move to a more serious topic, you’ve gained their attention and they know you’re genuinely interested in what they say.
Remember that building rapport and trust with kids takes time, so be patient and keep the lines of communication open about all topics. Additionally, be mindful of their age and developmental stage when choosing conversation starters.