I’m now accepting submissions for two new books. The first is a second edition of the parenting bestseller, The Mother of All Meltdowns. The book has been a huge success, but I believe there are a lot of meltdown stories left to be shared. This time around I want to hear about your personal relationship meltdowns! I don’t want you to talk smack about your partner. That’s not what this book is about. Rather, I want to hear about the funniest or craziest arguments you’ve ever had as a couple. What did you fight over that was so unbelievably stupid, you still laugh about it to this day? This is a ladies-only edition, again. Sorry guys!
Deadline for submissions: July 15, 2014
The second book is a “he said/she said” type of anthology, where dads and moms go head-to-head on hot button issues. Below is a list of some of the most common things men and women have different views on. Pick one that speaks to your soul and let’s hear your side or take on the issue. Stories should be humor infused, yet make a point through story telling and personal examples. The book will be broken up into three sections: Parenting, Passions, and Pickles (slightly sour stuff). A big thank you to Tom of Daddy Anarchy for the inspiration. Feel free to suggest other hot button issues, too!
Deadline for submissions: July 15, 2014
Baby’s Crying (again): Pick up and soothe immediately or let ‘em cry it out?
Co-sleeping: Yay or nay?
“I’m more tired than you” competition. Why is dad/mom more tired?
Stay-at-home mom/dad. We both need to work.
Discipline: Suzy Strict-land or Sally Softie?
Video games: Off limits or let them master ninja skills
You’re 18, get a job and get out. You can live with us forever!
Date night in or date night out?
Free time: Boy’s/girl’s night out or always together?
Family vacation or couples only retreat?
You never listen to me. What did you say?
Men are all alike. I will never understand women.
Bring on the sexy time. Please, for the love of gawd, leave me alone.
To bed angry or talk it out until resolved or someone dies of boredom?
In-Laws, oh yay! OR I want to run you over with my Ford truck.
Who wears the pants? Really. Do you dare answer?
Let’s spend to get ahead! No, no! Let’s save so we have five million dollars when we die!
I can fix it. Let’s hire a pro!
Cleaning: 50/50 or that’s YOUR job!
Do these make my butt look fat? Blatant honesty or little white lies to keep the peace?
Important dates (anniversary, birthdays, etc.): I never remember. I never forget.
Both books will be printed under my label, Blue Lobster Book Co. I will assume all costs related to publishing and marketing the books.
- Each submission should be between 1,500 and 3,000 words, embedded into the body of your email.
- Submissions should contain original content, not previously published. Please do not republish elsewhere. If accepted for inclusion into the book, submissions should not be used in their entirety as blog posts, articles, etc. for the period of time specified in contract. Duplicate content is penalized by major search engines and frowned upon by major publishers.
- Submissions are subject to copyediting; however, every effort will be made not to change the tone of the content.
- The submission should directly relate to a personal story or event, limiting the use of third-party names, where possible.
- Please avoid the use of quotes, poetry, and song lyrics, where possible, as they present copyright issues.
- Please include a bio, headshot, and URLs to blog, social media profiles, etc. (can send at a later date) for promotional purposes.
All contributors will be paid $100 for their submissions after publishing expenses are recouped (we recovered costs in less than sixty days with The Mother of All Meltdowns) and after the book reaches the required sales to reimburse across the board (i.e. 30 contributors = $3,000 in sales after expenses are recouped). More details will be provided if accepted in one or both of the anthologies. A bonus program will be available to those who actively and aggressively market the book on an ongoing basis.
Please send your submissions to firstname.lastname@example.org. Use the headline Submission: MOAM2 or Submission: He Said She Said.