Ah, school picture day. The one day a year that parents everywhere scramble to make sure their kids look halfway decent when they leave the house in the morning.
Hair brushed, clean clothes on, milk staches wiped. I mean, sure, there’s the first day of school. But we all know it’s overrated. Picture day is the one that really matters.
Because nothing captures our childhood quite like the annual school photo. It doesn’t matter that we have eleventy-billion photos of our kids taking up all of the space on our phones. These are the school photos dammit.
A memorialization of 13 years of joy, misery, and unending horror of homework, school projects, and common-core math all captured in an annual headshot of our beloved offspring.
It is THE photo that commemorates year after year of their childhood. The one that shows their transition from our sweet little kindergarten baby to our ohmygodhowisthisevenpossiblethatIamthisold high school graduate.
For the low, low price of $39.99, you get a snapshot of your child’s history. Which, let’s face it, is PRICELESS.
Know what else is priceless?
A Facebook post shared by mom Brittany Kinley of her son Mason’s school picture, in which Lifetouch gave her a bit more than she bargained for. The post has gone viral with over 4K likes, 1K comments, and 9K shares in the past 24 hours. And it’s no wonder.
They say a picture is worth a thousand words. But a picture that also includes the words “I DON’T WANT THIS”? is worth at least a gazillion, give or take.
She opens the post with the following:
I’m sure everyone needs a good laugh these days so thanks to my latest mom fail…you’re welcome in advance haha
You’re not wrong Brittany, we could all use a good laugh these days. And this definitely delivers.
Mason is absolute perfection in his kindergarten photo. His hair is perfectly coiffed, his plaid shirt is stain and wrinkle-free, his eyes are open wide and that smile.
I mean, really, it doesn’t get any better than this. As far as school photos go? This is the gold standard every parent everywhere silently prays their child’s photo will meet.
However, on closer inspection, there’s a little added bonus.
It’s not JUST a perfect headshot. Oh no. Thanks to the magic of modern-day technology and digital editing, Lifetouch has also included a handy-dandy memo on the bottom left-hand corner so you will never question which year it was taken in again.
They have generously added the grade and year in which the photo was snapped. But that’s not all.
They’ve also added the option to personalize the picture with your child’s name. Because 90 years from now, when you are old and senile, you may just need that reminder.
As for Brittany though, she chose to opt-out of having Mason’s name printed on the picture. Or, at least she thought she did.
Apparently, someone at Lifetouch misunderstood the memo. Or has a wicked sense of humor. Brittany explains:
Mason got his kindergarten pictures and I didn’t want his name on the bottom so I typed in “I don’t want this” and they freaking printed this…
And OMG, I may never stop laughing.
I mean, come on, I feel like there is NOTHING that sums up 2020 better than this.
Because 2020? With its raging bushfires, homicidal hornets, alien invasion, a global pandemic, widespread lockdowns, and an overwhelming sense that we are living in the fucking Hunger Games? Ain’t nobody wants this. NO-BOD-Y.
The fact that it is written in all caps? Just makes it that.much.better.
And Facebook users agree.
Just in case you think this is a one-off event, I assure you it is not. Other commenters have come forward with their own school photo fails and the results are hilarious.
Like this one, that simply wrote “No.” Giving a whole new meaning to Meaghan Trainor’s hit, “My name is no, my sign is no, my number is no…
Or this mom who wrote her OWN name:
And my personal favorite – the Sasshole, minus the “S”.
But it doesn’t stop there. It keeps going and going. Much like the glistening snot that just kept running down this kid’s nose:
And as for those retakes? The photographer might want to double-check the schedule with the school next time:
While some commenters think that Brittany should demand they be redone, I think I’d be buying a caseload of them.
For posterity’s sake. And ordering matching hats and t-shirts with the slogan – 2020 – I DON’T WANT IT. Who’s with me?
Make sure to check out her original post here.