17 Funny Tweets About The Things Parents Do #BeforeIFallAsleep

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One of the toughest things about parenthood is sleep– as in, not getting nearly enough of it. But even when your kids start sleeping through the night, some of us are our own worst enemies when it comes to going to bed at a decent hour.

I don’t know what it is about hopping into bed at night, but suddenly sleep tends to take a backseat to… anything, really. We want to sleep, but… let’s check Facebook one more time! Let me just see what’s new on Netflix! I’m just going to read one more chapter…

Why do we DO this to ourselves, guys??

The folks of Twitter know all about procrastinating before surrendering to sleep, and are here to share their own humorous late-night exploits with you.

 

  1. Even getting to your bed can be challenging, because KIDS.

 

2. To pee or not to pee: that is the question.

 

3. Truth: it doesn’t matter- you’ll still have to get up again & again. Yay for aging bladders!

 

4. Oh, sure, your body is tired, but your brain? Wheeeee!

 

5. So you scroll through social media. Put phone down. Pick phone up, & repeat.

 

6. Skipping sleep to scroll on your phone can be… painful.

 

7. “One more tweet. One more YouTube video”. (Time flies when you’re in that weird YouTube rabbit hole, doesn’t it??)

 

8. Two hours later, Netflix: “Are you still watching?” YES I AM, Netflix. Don’t judge me.

 

9. You finally settle down to sleep. And then it hits you: tomorrow is a school dress-up day… do we even own a cowboy hat?? Am I supposed to send a snack in?? Dammit.

 

10. Thanks, anxiety. Sleep is overrated, anyway, apparently.

 

11. In case you left a worry off your checklist, your brain’s got it! And WILL remind you.

 

12. And let’s not forget those weird, irrational fears that strike at 2am…

 

13. Then you begin the countdown: “If I fall asleep right now, I can still get…”

 

14. At least baby is sleeping… until you start to fall asleep, at least. How do they DO that??

 

15. If you sleep at all, that is, because again, KIDS.

 

16. You try to ensure that you’ll wake up on time after being up so late…

 

17. Unless you forgot to set an alarm- whoops! 

The best part: you’re so tired the next morning that you promise yourself you’ll go to bed early that night… but you know you’re lying!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Stephanie Ortiz is a SAHM of 6 who still can't quite figure out how she deviated from her original life plan of traveling the globe as a single, mad professor with too many cats & no kids. She enjoys blogging in her spare time, because it's cheaper than therapy. Her work has appeared in Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, The Daily Mail, Reader's Digest, & The Steve Harvey Show. She may maintain the facade of a mature, suburban housewife, but she's really an overgrown teenager that still enjoys pranking friends & air-guitaring to Nine Inch Nails. Find her at her blog, Six Pack Mom, or on Twitter.

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