To My Mommas Who Pee with the Door Open,
How are you? I bet you don’t get asked that enough as you would like. I presume that don’t receive many questions about how YOU are feeling, but at the same time are constantly bombarded with numerous question about or from your children.
I am glad to hear that you are doing well and I want you to know that your selfless habits don’t go unnoticed. Well, in truth, the likely go unnoticed by those that reap the benefits of your goodwill, but they do not go unnoticed by numerous other mothers, like me, who know precisely why you do what you do.
Peeing with the door open may gross some out, and if it were anyone other than a mom doing it, I would agree. Regardless, there are those that likely think that you doing such is very, very strange; but, no, not me — I get you.
Yep. You see, I recognize just how freaking hard you are working on nailing this whole motherhood thing and that peeing with the door open is only one of the many examples of how you ensure you are always accessible to your children.
You are the mom that breastfed on the loo.
You are the mom that took a crap while wearing your baby in their Baby Bjorn.
You are the mom that yells “give me a second, I’m in the bathroom,” but doesn’t lose her shiitake when the kids barge in milliseconds later.
You are the mom that stops her pee mid-stream to tend to her crying, colicky infant who just happened to rouse on cue at the exact wrong time.
You are the mom whose husband takes forty-minute poos, and despite the fact that a mere ten minutes alone would rejuvenate you, you still aim to be out of the restroom within five.
I know you because I am just like you. Like me, you pee with the door open because one or all of your children desire to be within your reach at every gosh darn second of the day.
You pee with the door open because you know the probability is damn high that one of your offspring, who love you love with all your heart, will need you while you attempt to relieve yourself.
Well listen, hun — all you really need to relieve yourself of is the inaccurate and ridiculous notion that you don’t deserve the time to pee or take care of yourself in any way.
Mothers can very quickly get caught up in the desire to relentlessly pursue perfection in how we mother and we have somehow resigned ourselves to the contention that to be excellent caregivers we must give ALL of ourselves to our children (and spouse) day in and day out.
You don’t.
Did you hear that?
You don’t, you shouldn’t and I sure as hell shouldn’t.
So, you –momma who is reading this as you sit on the potty with the door cracked open — why don’t you cry out to your kids this time (instead of them shouting to you) and when they answer your call, instruct them to close your door all the way.
I hope you enjoy your tinkle time a little more now and remember, you are still an impressive parent; just one that has the right to piss in private.
From a mama who admittedly still pees with the door open.