When it comes to being with the same person day in and day out, it’s no secret that times aren’t always going to be awesome. You’re dealing with two grown adults who have two separate personalities with two separate brains who have many separate wants. And a lot of that relationship advice for couples you read, or are told by well-meaning friends, is not realistic.
The good news is that it’s totally possible to have a healthy relationship where boundaries can be respected while finding ways to blend together as well. If you’re looking for some real relationship advice for couples, the following thoughts may help propel you and your partner forward in a positive way.
Real Relationship Advice for Couples
Remember this advice isn’t coming from a marriage counselor — just from one married spouse to another. (If you need professional help in your marriage or relationship, please go to a professional.)
Listen
Sounds easy, right? But there’s more to listening than just not talking. It’s actually HEARING what your partner has to say.
It’s also important to say that listening to your partner is not the same as waiting for them to stop talking so you can turn around and make your point.
That’s a rebuttal — and a defense mechanism.
Let your spouse get out what is on their mind, so it’s out there to be truly heard. Then you can move forward on ways to improve the situation.
Laugh
I think we can all agree that sometimes, life just sucks. There are so many negative things in the day that can drag you down. Being able to laugh with your partner is truly medicine that works.
Put in a stupid movie, share a corny joke, or do whatever it takes to get the giggles rolling between the two of you.
Bond
When people talk about bonding, it’s always over something extreme. Why? That honestly sounds exhausting and unrealistic.
Bonding can be as simple as taking an evening walk, going for a morning run, heading to your favorite coffee shop together, or sending funny memes or jokes all day long to stay at the forefront of their mind.
Sharing something good between just the two of you is the best bonding.
Don’t overcomplicate things
One of the biggest hurdles when it comes to relationships is that we expect so much to happen. Maybe it’s because of movies or social media — but it’s just not real life.
If you don’t tell your partner what you’d like to happen, don’t expect them to be mind readers. If you want them to bring you flowers every day and rub your feet every night — tell them. (And be prepared for them to say no.)
Having fun together or spending time together doesn’t have to be a date night on the town. It can be a movie on the couch at the end of the day or a breakfast together alone in the morning.
For your relationship to get stronger, heal, and move forward, be open to being simple. This doesn’t mean you’re settling, but it does mean you’re going to appreciate the little things that happen daily.