Getting kids up and out to school every single morning is no easy feat. We’re talking 180 mornings of rousing tired kids, scouring the house for lost shoes, and several panicked parental choruses of, “WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!”.
To me, a perfect school attendance record is like setting out to find the Holy Grail. You’ve heard it exists, but have never personally seen it.
You may have even set out to try & find it… until your quest ends swiftly & fiercely (enter: stomach virus).
So for students who have actually managed to succeed in having a perfect attendance record, it’s a BIG FRIGGING DEAL- and they should be commended for it.
One little girl received a reward for her perfect attendance, but her prize was stolen- and social media is both amused by and supportive of her tale of woe.
Second grader Taylor has had a perfect attendance record this year, and she was gifted a sweet reward by her school: a pink “Perfect Attendance” pencil.
No run-of-the-mill yellow #2 for the cream of the school crop!
But there was a problem. As Taylor explained to her mom (and thousands of amused followers), her pencil.was.stolen.
Here’s what went down:
Taylor put her pencil in the group “to be sharpened” box. The whole class knew the pink one was hers, of course, because PERFECT ATTENDANCE, BABY!
But when she opened up her box:
guess what i saw? nothing but yellow, plain old pencils.
And the plot thickens, because this was NOT an accident. Taylor was forced to use an ordinary yellow pencil:
because somebody -and i know who- stole my perfect attendance pencil, who didn’t even earn one…. because “THEY” were in canada.
Oh, snap- we’ve got a suspect!
And it’s a pint-sized thief that clearly forfeited her right to win a pink perfect attendance pencil because apparently a trip to Canada was more important than second grade.
(You gotta be IN it to win it, pencil snatcher. And you were in Canada while Taylor was racking up perfect attendance points, so give up the goods.)
“You know who” turned out to be LIZZY- who was busted by her table after having the nerve to use it on her morning work.
Pretty ballsy, Lizzy.
And even after being confronted about her right to have it -you know, that Canada trip and all- Lizzy was not going to give it up. There was stalling, evasiveness, and finally: no pencil.
The pencil was lost. And Taylor was pissed, because as she pointed out to her mom,
It’s a perfect.attendance.pencil!
Taylor’s mom Tabitha posted a video clip on her Instagram page (@tabgeezy) of Taylor, in her adorable indignation, explaining the crisis:
Although Taylor’s mom tried to calm her down by telling her that all pencils do the same thing, all pencils are not alike.
It was PINK. It was COOL.
If I was in second grade and had dragged my tired little butt to school every single day to win a special pencil, you can bet I’m not letting Lizzy get away with “losing” my prize.
The folks of social media weren’t having it, either, and totally had Taylor’s back in being outraged by the theft of her precious pencil.
Many commentors sympathized with Taylor & said that since she rightfully earned it, she should have it returned (or replaced).
Don’t even try to play, Lizzy. EVERYONE knows about your Canada excursion. You gave up your chance to be a pink-pencil-kid.
Yeah, Lizzy- go try and swipe another pink pencil. The world is watching.
I love my kids. I’d die for them… but I won’t share my special pens with them, because they’re special. Use your own pens, kids. And use your own damn pencils, Lizzy.
Bahaha! “Canada Lizzy”. Lizzy will rue the day her parents made her go to Canada as much as the day she decided to swipe Taylor’s pencil of pink perfection.
Same, Margaret Ann. SAME.
Sistatv isn’t playing around: we’re talking not only the return of the original item, but additional pencils as restitution for “pain and suffering”.
And the suggestion to create a petition via Change.org to “send Lizzy back to Canada ASAP”? Hilarious!
But in case you thought only Instagram was justifiably outraged for Taylor’s loss, Twitter had some… strong opinions on the matter as well.
I know I'm not ready to be a parent bc I'd be at that school the next day like "Yal deadass finna come up off my baby Perfect Attendance Pencil NEEOOOWW!!" pic.twitter.com/ezTc0fq1Ug
— Dreka Gates ? (@_FemGod) January 31, 2020
I’m a parent and pretty much feel the same way, so you’re ready, Dreka. You get it.
I know somebody better get this baby her pencil. pic.twitter.com/XJj2VfwRQQ
— Marian Williams (@wyguymom) January 31, 2020
If somebody ever takes my child’s perfect attendance pencil which SHE earned cuz she didn’t even go to Canada, the entire school getting shut down.
— emme star (@emme_tweets) January 31, 2020
If Taylor can’t have her perfect attendance pencil back, there will be NO ATTENDANCE AT ALL. BY ANYONE.
Nah I’d be the pettiest of all parents.. I’d surprise my daughter with a perfect attendance cup cake party the next day at school.. I’d bring one cupcake and all my brothers n sisters go come up with an attendance song n sing it for her.. n ima bring a sparkling candle
— KeiTreBlack (@keitre5) January 31, 2020
At the end of the song we gon have a special part that says n Lizzie can’t have one cause she was in Canada. Then we laugh like this as we place the perfect attendance tiara on my baby head pic.twitter.com/JH5cokVpHk
— KeiTreBlack (@keitre5) January 31, 2020
That’s a very specific, well-planned response. Savage, but well-planned. And likely effective.
Me as a mom: Oh the teacher didn’t do nothing?! Lizzie lost the pencil in her desk?!! Nah… pic.twitter.com/EygS8hNDIg
— BrilliantBad&Boujee (@LOfficielEbony) January 31, 2020
The “mama bear” mentality is coming on strong, too.
I’m goin to WAR for my baby perfect attendance pencil!! I’ll tear the whole classroom up if need be? pic.twitter.com/qUJzehvcAU
— cray baby? (@CraytonCortez) January 31, 2020
And I do mean STRONG.
LIZZIE is #3 Trending on Twitter
NOW.. Give Baby Girl, back her Perfect Attendance Pencil!!!
— Just a Gurl Who’s Now Out For BLOOD. (@JustAGurLnSwedn) January 31, 2020
Taylor’s nemesis is now TRENDING on Twitter. The people have spoken- they want Taylor’s pink Perfect Attendance pencil returned, pronto!
While it remains to be seen whether or not Lizzy will cough up the purloined pencil, it’s safe to say that the majority of the world feels for Taylor’s sense of indignant loss.
Perfect attendance is not something to take lightly, nor is stealing. Taylor worked hard to earn her reward, & deserves to have it replaced if not returned.
Let this be a cautionary tale to all children: sharpen your own special pencils at home. And if you’re a second-grade swiper who can’t keep your paws off someone else’s pink pencil, keep your trips out of the country on the down-low.