Man Tweets About His First Christmas Celebration & It’s Hilariously (& Painfully) Accurate

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It’s the most wonderful time of the year… or is it? As most moms know -and as SNL hilariously depicted in last week’s sketch – it takes a helluva LOT of effort to make Christmas morning magical for our families.

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We’re used to the pre-holiday grind; we know that Christmas prep is like college finals week. It’s late nights, massive carb consumption, & the panic of knowing you should have started preparing much earlier.

But what does Christmas look like for someone who hasn’t experienced all of the hullabaloo before? What would a newbie make of the whole process?

In a Twitter thread that has gone viral, one man describes his observations as he celebrates Christmas for the first time, & his take on it is both hilarious and painfully accurate.

Mohammad Hussain (@MohammadHussain) explains that his Muslim family never celebrated Christmas. But due to the pandemic, going home is not an option, so:

My roommates are teaching me how to have my first proper Christmas.

Intrigued by the prospect of observing Christmas festivities in action, Mohammad tweeted that he’d be sharing his take on Twitter:

“With anthropological precision”? Well, color us intrigued, too. Game on!

Mohammad breaks his experience into several observations, & his first one NAILS IT.

  Yass! Christmas prep IS a part-time job: long hours, overtime without pay, and involuntary work on weekends.

Speaking of weekends…

The “agonizing over the gifts” part? I feel seen.

  Nailed it, guy. In my house, it’s Pillsbury cinnamon buns. The idea of someone daring to request an alternate makes me feel stabby.

Mohammad should count himself lucky that he has such thoughtful roommates- I suspect there are many women whose *roommates (*HUSBANDS) didn’t think of stuffing their wife’s stocking even though she stuffed HIS stocking, and all of the kids’ stockings, and the cat’s stocking.

(Thankfully, my husband now prescribes to Mohammad’s Observation #2… after what we shall refer to as the “Awkward Empty Stocking Incident of 2006”.)

PREACH! While we try to stick to a budget, life happens.

(So does paying astronomical one-day shipping fees because your “roommate” neglected to mention that he forgot to buy his mom a gift… which is known as the “$42 In Shipping?!!” fiasco of 2012.)

So true! The “fillers” are on the bottom of the tree, where toddlers & pets roam. The valuable stuff? Up top.

Look, don’t touch, kiddos- one day you’ll be yelling at your own kids not to touch that Hallmark Snoopy ornament. 

To get into the spirit of the season, Mohammad even bought his OWN special ornament: an appropriate homage to Christmas carbo-loading.

(You had me at bagel, Mohammad.)

That everything bagel didn’t come cheap… which is his next observation:

TRUTH! He nailed this one. Ornaments ARE expensive.

And that pricey glitter bagel must always be at the top of the tree. Those cheaper lower tree branch ornaments are the unsung heroes of the Christmas season- sacrificed in the paws of pets & small children.

It can get muddy trying to blend the whole “Jesus is the reason for the season” with  “Santa Claus is coming to town”.

(And don’t even get me started on the Elf On The Shelf’s weird house-creeping ways.)

What’s Christmas Eve/Day without copious amounts of calories?? And WINE.

Despite enjoying his first Christmas, Mohammad’s viral Twitter observations about the season are not only amusing, but accurate AF.

He gives well-deserved props to harried holiday preppers everywhere:

Many of us are jaded by the predictably arduous process of preparing for Christmas, but it’s fun to see the experience through a set of fresh eyes. With three days until Christmas, Mohammad is right- let’s applaud the “longtime Christmas celebrators” that kick ass in making the holiday magic happen!

 

 

 

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