These days, there are plenty of cool underwear options to choose from when it comes to both style and comfort: bikini briefs, boy-shorts, hipsters, granny panties, thongs, etc. Hell, you can even go commando if you want- underwear be damned!
And as far as jeans- who doesn’t love a good pair of denim jeans, soft & well broken-in to perfectly fit your own unique body curves, right??
However, there are times when the undergarment industry mates with the fashion world & produces an ugly, mutant underwear-jean-shorts baby that no one -I mean, absolutely no one– should wear.
The newest odd trend in the denim realm that’s throwing social media into a tizzy is “janties”, also known as “denim panties”.
Denim jeans- awesome. Underwear- also awesome. Denim jeans when manipulated into becoming underwear, however- NOPE.
The outfit featured in the above picture is confusing enough to give janties a hard pass.
It has the look of, “Business formal on top, va-JEAN-jay on the bottom!” What is going ON here??
If you examine the lines of the denim, you can clearly see that those thighs will be hurting from some deep chafing… which is probably the only kind of rug-burn you’ll be getting down there since no one else is likely to want to pop that high-waisted button to get sexy with you in this perplexing booty jean-underwear hybrid.
And as for having all that denim jammed up into your hoo-hah, let’s just say that after a few warm hours of wearing these babies, you’ll have more yeast brewing than a bread factory.
But if the front view isn’t convincing enough, take a look at the backside:
If this model actually had an ass, you’d quickly realize that janties would be giving her a denim wedgie of mass proportions both up the front AND the back. If you’re trying to show off your, um, assets, digging denim out of your crack isn’t the most appealing visual.
Good thing they kept the back pockets, though, right? Because clearly these denim panties are all about sensibility.
“Janties” were created by the French fashion brand Y/Project, and are currently being sold online by the Canadian retailer Ssense.
Here’s the company slogan for the high-cut denim monstrosities:
Underwear that doesn’t need to stay “under-there”.
(No, it should, Ssense. It should stay under-there. Really, really far under-there.)
And the best part about janties? The PRICE. They are listed at $315 per pair.
Even better- they are SOLD OUT. People are buying these, guys. A lot of people, apparently. And this is exactly why we can’t have nice things like the internet, because people can abuse the powers of the internet by buying and wearing these.
There’s no word on when janties will be back in stock, so if you’re hoping to snag a pair of these denim diapers from Ssense, you’ll have to wait. Unless of course, you find manage to somehow find them available elsewhere.
finally got my hands on a pack of those $315 jean panties pic.twitter.com/NIstSJS6VY
— Erik Germ (@HugeFrigginArms) April 4, 2019
$315 for the most uncomfortable pair of underwear you will ever own. Best deal on the internet.