I don’t know about you but when I went to the supermarket to load up on food and supplies to prepare for a coronavirus outbreak in my community, I was thinking about things like Tylenol and bleach wipes.
I was not, however, thinking, “Hey, I should load up on condoms and stop this pandemic by sticking them on my fingers before I touch the stuff.”
It’s been a long time since I took a science class but I’m pretty sure condoms are better suited for an entirely different public health threat; STDs and unwanted pregnancies, for example. But what do I know?
Folks in Singaporeans and now even Aussies have us covered, though.
Several viral social media posts that have been floating around are making claims that people should buy condoms to wear on their fingers in order to stop the spread of coronavirus.
The trend has hit Reddit and Twitter where people are posting images of sold-out condom displays and of people wearing condoms as they push elevator buttons in public spaces.
what Singaporeans are using condoms for because of the coronavirus. ?? #coronavirus pic.twitter.com/CzfMU4iNBV
— Melanie Ngai ?????? ??? (@melngai416) February 7, 2020
While it appears that maybe this isn’t an actual Singapore elevator according to comments, and some of this could be fake news, but we’re dying to know – do they lube up first?
But wait, all kidding aside lemme blow your mind for a second.
It turns out that food finger condoms are a legit thing in Asia.
Back in 2014, The Huffington Post described a craze for something called the Finger Nap that looked an awful lot like a finger condom that folks could use while eating things like fried chicken or greasy burgers.
The selling point is that the finger condom has less material than a full glove.
There is less waste considering that the Finger Nap is a single-use plastic item that is offered at major fast-food chains throughout Korea and different parts of Asia.
When we consider that one of the first outbreaks of coronavirus that morphed to a community spread resulting in 6,000 confirmed cases and with a fatality rate of 0.6% it kind of makes sense that people would reach for a finger condom (that’s what they’re called, people, stop laughing!)
Authorities in China and South Korea ordered that apartment building where people are still being quarantined also be routinely disinfected, and that includes elevator buttons – the very thing that people were using the finger condoms to prevent viral spread.
Can I just ask a quick question here? Aren’t condoms not cheap?
I mean, even in the viral posts we can easily see how much a pack of condoms costs and when you consider how many times you touch stuff in public, those condoms costs add up fast.
Can I just ask another question? Why not use your elbow or tissue or literally anything else that is free, not made of plastic, and won’t make people wonder if that spicy “ribbed for her pleasure” is leaving behind a glistening sticky mess of lube.
Yuck.
Several sources have claimed that shops are running out of condoms as people use them to protect their fingers when pressing public buttons or touching common property like handrails. #9Newshttps://t.co/2JyUOhmlSH
— Nine News Gold Coast (@9NewsGoldCoast) March 5, 2020
Listen, coronavirus is freaking scary. We get it.
And it is likely that things will get far worse before they get better.
But before we lose our damn minds and start thinking that condoms are for anything other than gettin’ down, can we all agree that LITERALLY WASHING YOUR HANDS and exercising basic common sense might actually be enough to slow the spread of this and other viruses?
And, also – I’m going to leave this right here. If you’re really scared about touching an elevator button – stock up on these. They probably cost a whole lot less.
There's this thing called…….
Finger cots(otherwise known as finger condoms)
What a waste of an actual condom for this…?_? pic.twitter.com/MsPKV9q1zK— Daniel 4m? Austin(???) (@DXNDXNDXN) March 5, 2020
*But, seriously, go wash your damn hands.*