Practical Tips For The Dads That Aren’t Getting Laid

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Do you ever look back on the early years of your relationship and ask yourself where all the sex went? Things used to be so hot! A couple of kids and a mortgage later, and you can’t even remember the last time you got it twice in a week (or a month). And it’s GOT to be her fault, right?

Brush the Cheeto crumbs off your beer guts, dads, and pay attention to some pointers I have for you. 

Here are a few practical tips for the dads that aren’t getting laid

Stop eating so much crap at night; it’s making you gassy.

An hour and a half before you climb in bed, you’re walking around making wind like a box fan. The bedroom smells like a porta-John and, although it does match your decade old pajamas, it’s not half the aphrodisiac you seem to think it should be.

Help her clean the house; your laziness is annoying.

There is nothing on this planet that will turn your woman on more than you washing some dishes and picking up the living room. You could put your phone down right now and go try this one and you would see some devil in her smile before the night was over.

She fell in love with you because she thought you were competent. Now you have her convinced that you don’t know how to fold a towel. And you wonder why she has a headache every night.

Go get some exercise; it’s good for her (and you).

You don’t have to be a gym rat who posts 57 workout selfies a day on social media but you do need some cardio. If you live a sedentary lifestyle, your ambition, your motivation, and your energy levels won’t be the only thing that’s flaccid in your life.

This is not about you looking good nearly as much as it is about you feeling good. Men who feel good are smarter because they have more mental clarity. And men with mental clarity know that three hours of television is not foreplay.

Are you wondering what happened to all the sex you were having in the beginning of your relationship? This post is for the men in your life that are wondering why they aren't getting the sex they want in the relationship. #sex #marriage #filterfreeparents

Plan the action; good sex isn’t an accident.

You can’t fall into bed with your exhausted woman at midnight and think a fifteen second, one-handed back rub is going to light a fire in her soul. Be direct with her early in the day. “Hey, let’s make it happen tonight!” And then speak to her heart with your words and actions as often as possible, even on days when it isn’t going to happen. Believe me, she won’t forget.

If you were to cook supper for your lady tonight and she were to tell you she didn’t want any of it, it wouldn’t be because she was “just not interested in food any more.”

There is a good chance that if she turned your meal down it was because it didn’t look very appetizing. Here’s how you have to look at it: sex is a language, and women aren’t from the same country as you and me.

That means we MUST learn their language. Take these four tips and start saying some things that actually make sense to her and, I promise, you’ll have your smile back in no time.

 

2 COMMENTS

  1. Some of the advice is sexist as hell. Imagine a man saying ‘you need to look good for your partner’. They did in the 50’s and boy let me tell you how well that goes over now.

    Try again.

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